Written on March 26, 2012 – edited on November 22, 2020 and published in 2021
I honestly don’t know who’s the dumbest. Him, for staying hopeful or she, for believing that there are chances.
He is still there, firm and strong, pumping liters of feeling, waiting for the right moment. It never stops. He makes plans, relives yesterday, gets emotional. From time to time he weakens and cries. From time to time he is optimistic. It fuels a growing desire, a search for the lost. It seems that he doesn’t understand that it’s over, that there’s no way, he just doesn’t accept it. Idiot, poor thing. Dumb. That he is blind, everyone knows, but the alternative deafness came as a gift with this one: he only hears what he wants. And would it be any different?
She romanticizes everything. She hears and sees all the signs, she believes, in vain, that there are chances. It is a pity to know that she reviews all the moments together, from beginning to end and vice versa. She formulates poems, songs, and verses play to invent situations where everything goes well. She does what she does, but she does nothing. Because she knows that deep down, it is not quite like that. She knows that everything has changed and doesn’t change anymore… she just doesn’t want to stop dreaming. After all, that’s her job. Behold, she architect reunions, detailed, embarrassing, hot, or cold. It depends. Poor thing… They say that the worst of the blind-deaf-dumb are those who are not by nature but by choice.
But, I must admit, they make a beautiful pair, they are a good couple. They just need to put themselves back in their place once and for all and stop the drama. They have passed the age. He has to hurt himself for others. She has to think about herself. Because, in the end, that’s how it always works. It is always hurting the other that life protects itself, until the final card… Isn’t it? Until everything passes, he is made of iron and she is down to earth, too realistic, inhumanly cold. Love? You make me laugh.
And, just for those who did not understand who such a couple is, I calm them down. I’m not talking about a novel of mine, even though, it’s about me. He’s me. Her too. Both heart and mind. Always together, yet far apart…